Busted toe; busted nose. Well maybe not busted but it sure feels that way. Some days I can certainly be an idiot. And, on other days, if I could simply attain the intelligence displayed by a certified, grade A moron—I would be one happy guy.
Last weekend I was pounding up siding on my timber framed shed. The sun was shinning, the temperature was in the 60s, and things were moving along quite nicely. However, as I was cutting, boards were stacking up on the sawhorses, and if you push one end of the stack of lumber the other end moves. And, if you continue to push a bit on the end you are working on, the other end continues to move. If you keep pushing, well, eventually you get to the point that the whole stack falls off the sawhorse. Well, I proved this and the entire stack fell on my foot. It hurt so friggin’ bad that I could not even swear. I hobbled around for a couple of hours before I was brave enough to remove my sock and shoe so I could admire the black and blue.
One week later, I picked up some boards at Menards (clearly I didn’t need a straight board, which can’t be found at Menards). I was securing the boards to the back of my truck and tugging on the straps to make sure they were tight. While tugging on straps I highly recommend that you don’t pull your fist toward your face. Otherwise, you may find your nose full of fist. How would I know this you ask? Well, half a second after the strap broke, my fist collided quite heavily with my nose. Next thing I know, I am seeing stars and bleeding. I haven’t had a bloody nose in many years. This if the first time, I think, that I managed to give myself a bloody nose.
Some of us just have a special talent I guess.